Parenting Book Review & Giveaway: The No-Cry Discipline Solution

by farrah on May 17, 2012 · 24 comments

The No-Cry Discipline Solution is based on one important fact: Parents know their children best. This book turns discipline into a positive, affirming experience by offering a collection of proven techniques that you can custom-tailor to your child’s unique personality.

I am not a parenting-book reader. Not even close! I failed miserably at reading the happy block books because I just couldn’t really focus and get into them. Maybe it was that my kids weren’t ‘there’ yet- or I was just too tired to read, but I can freely admit that I am flying by the seat of my pants most days when it comes to parenting. I have a moms group that I get my advice from- and that’s about it- be it a good or a bad thing.

UntilThree’ came along. And I am not talking about the number of children I have…more like the AGE of Three.

My moms group and I all are going through Three at the same time, so although it’s really great to commiserate- none of us really has a ‘plan’ so to speak. So when I was contacted by Elizabeth Pantley the author of the ‘No Cry Discipline Solution’ I was intrigued. At first, I almost said no- but then I looked up her book. I don’t really have all that much time to read parenting books- and I can’t say that I have much desire either- but Three is really showing me it’s stuff and I need help.

What started happening was that as I read- I liked what I was reading. I was able to picture scenarios I encountered during the week and could see applying her advice would have been helpful had I known how to handle (or at least recognize) these issues beforehand. I also enjoy her perspective (being a mom of four of her own) looking back.  She didn’t make me feel judged or wrong. Several things that she has said have struck the proverbial cord with me- and I feel like I am getting tools to deal with the chaos at hand.

For example…here’s a little gem I read in the beginning:

“Just as childbirth educators believe that understanding baby care before the baby comes home gives parents the knowledge for coping with the challenges they meet after baby comes, I believe that looking ahead to the time when your child will be a young adult will provide you with tremendous guidance and insight as you raise your young child today.” p.17

Simple, right? Something I admit that I don’t really think about- and formerly working in high schools- I am very conscious as to how I do NOT want my children to act or behave once they get to those more advanced years. I like taking this perspective and hope to keep that awareness with me as we go along.

I also liked her ideas on:

Be Willing To Break The Rules (p. 30)- A discussion on the fun there is to be had in letting loose on that rare occasion you go against the norm. For me that would be the schedule. I like this idea and want my boys to see me as a mom who has an agenda and a plan- but can be fun too.

Know That It’s Not That Important (p. 32)- I’m so guilty of this. I make more out of something small- when in reality, it’s not a big deal. She says “Keep your priorities clear. Life will be more peaceful when you can convince yourself that a green bean is only a green bean- not an attack on your values, your parenting skills, or your domestic talents.” THIS. There are days I find myself ready to wage war over the lunchtime hoopla.  I know that there are things I need to let go- otherwise, I am sure to drop over dead of a stress induced heart attack by 40.

Rest Assured That Your Kids Love You, Even When They Hate You (Because They Really Don’t) (p. 35) “Remember that children are egocentric-they are concerned primarily with their own needs and wants. Saying no gets in the way of them doing what they want to do…they aren’t even thinking about you– they are thinking about the thing they want to do but can’t. You just happen to be the barer of bad news’. I need this reminder. B is just starting to get mad at me- and although it breaks my heart to see him so angry or upset, I can’t take it personally.

Periodically she brings up a key point that makes total sense- but at the same time I found that I had never really thought of it that way- such as:

A child is emotion in motion-untamed emotion in constant motion. Only with maturity and experience will a child develop the tools that bring emotional control.

Yes. Especially as I sit here recollecting the morning filled with the emotional highs and low with my three year old.

I could sit here and continue to go on and on about how much I am learning about my kids and myself through this book- but I think you get the picture. Obviously- I recommend it. Do I know you’ll love it? Absolutely not. I know that we all are different people with different parenting styles and that’s what makes us unique. Do I think you might get something out of it? I hope so. I can honestly tell you that the other books I’ve read on parenting topics never make it past the third chapter- so I consider this one a winner and hope that you might too. If you’d like to take a peek check out some excerpts here.

In fact, I like this book SO much I wrote to the author and asked if she minded giving away a copy. I would normally give away my copy- but I want to keep it! Thankfully she was happy to do so!

That said- if you’d like to win your own copy of ‘The No-Cry Discipline Solution’ all you have to do is give me a comment. Tell me your thoughts on parenting books and if you’ve ever found one that’s been truly helpful. I’d love to hear if you have!

One entry per person. I’ll post the winner in my ‘winners’ tab when the contest closes next Thursday, May 24th at 9pm est. US only.

* She also has many other books in the ‘No-Cry’ series that can also be purchased at Amazon.

This giveaway is CLOSED.

Disclosure- I was sent a copy of this book to review. All opinions and thoughts are my own. I am sure this book cannot solve all of your parenting woes- but it might help address one or two- score!

{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Brianne May 17, 2012 at 1:59 pm

OHH Sign me up! Bugs is already a tantrum thrower and I need to be “learned” on how to handle these things! I think eventually I’d like her cooperation book too because I can’t STAND when I over hear parents asking 5000 times for their kid to “do something” when they child is obviously old enough to know better. My mom asked ONCE and that was it! I want things to go as smoothly as possible with minimal hurt feelings!

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2 AmyH May 17, 2012 at 2:51 pm

I love that you made Three a proper noun because it totally is! I liked the No Cry Sleep Solution and would love to read this one as well. My main thing with discipline is to never get to the point of washing his mouth out with soap because my mom did that and I HATED it. But some days I understand why… sassy mouth, potty talk, and yelling no? Not okay, kid!

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3 Danielle May 17, 2012 at 5:50 pm

HELP ME!!! I am sooo bad a discipline (check out my blog post called “Behavior Modification”). I have never read a parenting book because they just seem too long for me. I have skimmed some chapters but never actually read the whole thing. But I’m also at Three and have one coming up so I could use some assistance!

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4 Shana K May 17, 2012 at 6:49 pm

I have The Sensitive Child book for my 3 year old daughter and that had some helpful tips for a child who is over sensitive and anxious in new, and sometimes normal, situations. It’s not so much of a behavioral book as it is a explanation of their personalities though but I liked it. I would love to win a copy of this book though too as I’m sure I could find some very helpful tips in it!

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5 Kristine Simpson May 17, 2012 at 9:39 pm

I really liked a lot of the ideas in No Cry Sleep Solution Book. Our 16 month old is very strong willed and I would love to hear her input for discipline, as well.

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6 tanya May 18, 2012 at 12:30 am

I like the what to expect in the first year. I get the emails knline too. I like seeing what is normal for my sons age and what is doming soon.

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7 Jen May 18, 2012 at 3:02 am

I have read so many gentle discipline books over the years. Nothing seemed to help my middle child. But recently we discovered some of her anger management struggles were related to physical problems, possibly food sensitivities. Now that things are better, I feel the need to start from square one again!

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8 Jessica May 18, 2012 at 3:44 am

I loved NCSS and now my 2.5 year old knows she is winning more than I’d like and I desperately need to get back in control.

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9 Emily May 19, 2012 at 2:42 pm

My favorite? The No-Cry Sleep Solution. I have long held to the theory that parents who just let their kids cry as a solution to ever behavior thy don’t like is pure laziness. Not to mention cruel. You aren’t “weaning” when you take the bottle away and ignore the cries. My Grandmother bought me Dr. Spock because she thought it was super. I disagreed with almost everything in there! I’m about to throw it to the curb. One line that really irked me, when baby is 2-3 months of age, they are capable of going without nighttime feedings. Try ignoring their cries and see what happens. If they get out of hand, go ahead and feed baby and apologize, try again later. Ummm, what? No, no thank you. There were many others….

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10 Jennifer Shipp May 19, 2012 at 9:42 pm

The first discipline book that I fell in love with was “Kid Cooperation” by Elizabeth Pantley. It was the first book of hers I had ever read – I loved it! And the one other book that I really like is called “Common Sense Parenting.” Becky Bailey has some good stuff but it’s hard to get through IMO but I’ve seen her present at a conference and she is great.

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11 Kristin May 20, 2012 at 12:02 am

I like The Happiest Toddler on the Block. I didn’t read it, but my husband gave me the lowdown. It has influenced how I sometimes diffuse situations with “Yes, (insert child’s name) is angry and wants a snack. Mommy understands.” It’s amazing how sometimes, all they want is to know that we know what they said.

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12 Karen May 21, 2012 at 3:04 am

I wish I could find real solutions with my boys…I admit I have thumbed through a discipline focused book, but I am not consistent and I think that is key…It’s hard to have that consistency when you are just trying to make it moment to moment. Maybe by the time they are adults, I will have it figured out…

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13 Robyn May 21, 2012 at 12:43 pm

Would really like to find a concrete way to get through Two – not even to Three yet! Something my husband and I can both agree on, and that will work with our daughter in all situations, not just at home. This sounds wonderful!

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14 Diane Blake May 22, 2012 at 1:40 pm

I love David Walsh’s book, No, Why Kids of all Ages Need to Hear it and Ways Parents Can Say it. It has helped eliminate tantrums over not getting things that they want!

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15 Libby Renshaw May 22, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Siblings Without Rivalry is a book that has helped me – although I could use a lot more help ;-). I also love the techniques and ideas of Parent Coach Tom Dozier – he uses the term ‘Positive Parenting’ – you can check out his lectures on http://www.3lparenting.com/.

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16 KerryB May 22, 2012 at 3:56 pm

hmmmm I have a hundred parenting books and have only read 2 on twin sleeping and baby names (that ones doesn’t count but I swear I read every page). I am looking for a book on being a better parent which to me means NOT screaming and yelling. I’m looking for ways to be kinder so maybe my children will be calmer. Good luck to whoever wins!

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17 NW Homesteader May 22, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Would love to win and try out with my 3 girls!

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18 Lara N May 23, 2012 at 7:24 pm

I actually found parts of the No-Cry Sleep Solution to be helpful, also the Baby Book by Dr. Sears, and 1-2-3 Magic! which is also a discipline book. Unfortunately there has been no ‘magic bullet’ book that has been a stand-alone success. Hopefully this disciple book will help a bit 🙂

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19 Michelle P. May 24, 2012 at 3:14 pm

It is focused on potty training, but there is actually a lot of advice about how to parent in Oh Crap Potty Training. My husband and I found several small changes we needed to make which work for daily life and worked for potty training. I think you have to take all parenting advice with a grain of salt, but I love hearing new ideas because you never know when you will find something that will work for at least one of your kids.

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20 samantha May 24, 2012 at 3:27 pm

this could be helpful with my son

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21 Melinda T May 24, 2012 at 5:32 pm

I’ve never read any parenting books, though I guess I should, my two year old certainly needs the disciplining. I think this book will be helpful for me in parenting both my girls.

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22 Lindsey West May 24, 2012 at 7:20 pm

I am not a fan of parenting book but recently I found a book that really helped me and that took me by surprise. It is called “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” I would have never guessed that this book would help me with parenting. Also, I wouldn’t have normally entered for this giveaway but I have a 6 year old that I just don’t know what to do with! This would definitely help me!!!

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23 Brittany B May 24, 2012 at 10:50 pm

I would love to win this. I think it would help out me and my son. I don’t feel like he listens to me at all. I could really use some tips to learn a way that would work for use.
Thanks for the giveaway.

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24 Amber D. May 24, 2012 at 11:52 pm

I really like her “No-Cry Sleep Solution” book and found it to be helpful. I also really like the 5 love languages for children book by Gary Chapman and I can’t remember the other author’s name, lol

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