I met my friend Danielle quite a while ago. In fact, I love relationships that I can’t remember when or how they began- they just ‘are’. Danielle just had her second child and is making the adjustment of going from one to two. I am always fascinated by this transition as I don’t really feel like we had time to ‘ease’ into one to three. She’s been kind enough today to guest post for me and discuss a topic I can easily relate to myself. Our two year old twins are revolting against the bedtime machine- much like her two year old. Please welcome Danielle from her lovely blog Sweet Serendipity.
Help…my two year old is holding me hostage!
For two years now we’ve had a great schedule, dinner, bath, bed. Our bedtime routine consists of reading stories and singing a few songs. It usually takes about a half hour, I kiss her good night, and she goes to bed. Until recently…
Now I need my own hostage negotiating team just to get me out of there. I am literally held hostage at bedtime by tears, screaming, begging, pleading, and demanding me to (in her words) “ay down”. From the moments we enter her room the door is slammed shut behind me. The second I go to stand up, she immediately throws her arms around my neck like a baby monkey, so I can’t leave. One day she even tried sky diving from the foot of the bed. My Superman catch mid fall was amazing!
The problem is even if I lay with her she doesn’t fall asleep. She talks to me about her day, sings to me, counts, reads, asks me to rub her back…basically anything to distract me from the fact that I am trying to make her go to bed. She leaves me no choice, but to let her cry it out, which is heartbreaking. However, her crying only lasts for a few minutes and she immediately drifts off to bed, validating the fact that she was completely exhausted and ready.
It’s difficult for me to escape, since it’s often her mommy alone time. She has been adjusting pretty well to sharing me with her new sister and I value our precious bedtime moments. It was simply much easier when she accepted the fact that it was bedtime, kissed me good night and went peacefully to sleep. I am hoping that it is a phase, just another wonderful thing that comes with the territory of being two. I just hope it doesn’t last long, or else I may need to call in back up.
Do your children test bedtime boundaries? What are some of their bedtime fiascoes?
Danielle is an mama of two beautiful girls, who is adjusting to life with a toddler and a new infant. She’s currently on maternity leave, but will be returning to work just in time for state testing. Danielle writes about her love for her children, and juggling full time working with full time mommy hood, all while trying to maintain a healthy relationship with her husband. Any mama can relate to her blog at:
Sweet Serendipity or follow her on Twitter @Serendipitymama.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh Danielle, you have no idea. Not really sure how we got through all of the drama with B as a toddler- but the twins are a completely different story. You’d think that the fact they had another person in there to keep them company would help them ease off to sleep. Not the case. For a while (here anyhow) they were ripping off their blankets and pillows, throwing them on a pile in between the beds- and then jumping off of the bed into the piles while they were supposed to be napping. So.. I started lying down in there until they fell asleep. Bad move. They then realized that if that worked at nap time- I’d do the same at bedtime. So… this went on for a little more than 2 months and we JUST broke the cycle last week. This is so universal- and I think if a parent ever tells you that they have a perfect sleep routine they’re full of it.
Oh my! I have tried laying with her because honestly these precious bedtime moments won’t last forever, but before you know it, it’s after 9 and she is still staring at me. We’ve started doing more of a count down this week and it seems to be working some of the time. We are going to bed in five minutes, we are reading one more story after this and tomorrow we will do such and such. I am hoping she will eventually go back to being easy. It’s also been a huge change having a brand new sibling.
Oh my…I think you just called me “full of it”…lol. The only thing my 3 year old does great is sleep. No lie. Now watch, I am probably jinxing myself. Fingers crossed!
Erica~ That’s wonderful. Mine was an amazing sleeper, too and once she goes down, she still is, it is now the process of getting her to go to bed that’s gotten a little hairy. I’m glad that your 3 year old didn’t have that phase.
Ugh, I can relate! My 3 year old twins hate going to bed. I’ve tried routines, no TV, singing, everything and no matter what, they refuse to sleep. I absolutely dread bedtime. I separate them and they run across the hall or talk to each other. I’m so lucky by 1.5 year old is a good sleeper!
Yikes! It’s hard enough with one, I can’t imagine two at the same time. One takes so much energy and work, I always find moms of multiples amazing!
I just recently wrote about a very similar issue we’re going through with our 18 month old daughter. It’s frustrating to go from a great sleeper to a hostage taker seemingly overnight. What’s even worse is we’ll find a scenario that works for her for a few nights and then she catches on to our plans and throws our routine right out the window. I’m told it is a phase and to remain firm and consistent and it will eventually fade away but right now I just want to pull my hair out.
I know it’s hard. They are extremely smart. It’s amazing how quickly they catch on to a new plan. My friends also say it is a phase and to stay strong and as consistent as possible. Laying there until they fall asleep could take hours and then you are setting yourself up to do that for a very long time.